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Australia (a neat place to be)

After three months over Christmas I found myself crossing the international date line on my way to Autralia. I had never been to Australia and until earlier that year never been to the Southern Hemisphere. I've always had aspirations to go as far south as possible, to the centere of the South Pole. Hitch a hide on a research vessel and go get weird with the penguins. I will settle for Australia as a good stepping stone to Antartica. The place is fucking foreign as hell. Despite the fact Australians speak English and look like fat westerners, they live amongst a landscape that is rugged and gnarly beyond belief. It's only continent to have never undergon an ice age. This means that all them big predatory cocksuckers have been able to evolve and just hang out for thousands of years. Australia a bad ass even from the sky. Wait, especially from the sky.

Our boat was based out of Port Lincoln, a tiny town in Southern Australia on the coast of the Great Australian Bight, a big ol' body of shaky water, that's constantly upset from deep southern swell coming up from Antartica. However, as small and remote as it was, Port Lincoln is a super cool spot to explore. Tiny and kind of poorly layed out, but if you got two feet and heart beat you can see a good chunk of the place on foot. Plus, it is a semi-tropical climate in the Southern Hemisphere, so all the flora and fauna around the area are extremely exotic.

This statue of a horse basically sums up Southern Australia: weird and awesome.

You can wander around the surrounding neighborhoods and sit in a park for hours watching parots just fuck around.

Or you can take a super expensive taxi, like 40km up the road to a hilarious animal reserve. All sorts of funky animals, and big fuck-off bird cage you can go hang out in and let parrots crawl over you. I was way more into kangaroo snuggles.

The view from my hotel. Trust me they ain't all this nice.

Made a quick 24 hour stop over in Sydney to see my boy Brenton. 22 drinks and THIS was the only shot we got from the night...Just Australia. Love em or hate em they like to have a good time.

About this blog

This blog is intended to be a unfiltered, unadulterated, narrative non-fiction of my experiences. The opinions and stories expressed here may not always be tasteful or even fair, but they will always be true. If it's a greasy story I will make an attempt to hide someone's identity. But be fairly warned: if we are getting greased together, then everything that goes down is fair game for this blog. Everything else will depend on how well I remember it and how, or if, I can tie it back into a decent enough story worth writing about. Whatever happens I promise to try and keep this blog interesting, relevant and up to date.


"If I go, I'm going out shameless"

 - Gregory Alan Isakov

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